I Know What I Want!

I eagerly look forward to Halloween each year because inevitably some of the children in their costumes surprise me.  Last night was no exception and while I thoroughly enjoyed the energy and enthusiasm of the ‘trick-or-treat’ revelers, there were two little girls that just had me rolling in laughter.  They each in their own way signaled that they knew exactly what they wanted and in their uniquely innocent ways, reminded me that keeping things simple is sometimes the best path.

Both girls were probably not more than 4 years old and as cute as little ones can be especially at that age.  Both were somewhat shy in approaching our doorway and in a meek voice whispered their ‘trick-or-treat’ greeting.  This is where things got really funny.  The first girl watched me carefully place the candy in her bucket only to promptly pull it out proclaiming quite boldly and clearly that “I don’t like that kind” as she handed it back to me.  Trying to keep from bursting in laughter, I reached back into the bucket and pulled out something different asking her if that was better.  “Yes” she proclaimed, thanked me, and was on her way.  I just nearly split my gut laughing after she left and my wife who hadn’t witnessed this innocent act of assertion was soon laughing with me.

The second girl was even younger and being escorted by her older sister.  Like the first, she approached quietly and almost imperceptibly requested her treat.  After reaching into the bucket and placing a piece of candy in her bag, she looked up at me as if “only one piece” was insufficient and without a single word, reached her hand into the bucket, grabbed a few more pieces, thanked me, and turned.  Her sister all the while had this shocked look on her face insisting her younger sister return the extra candy.  I told her it was fine and they left.  Once again, I’m rolling on the stoop laughing uncontrollably.  Ah the innocence of children!

There was a valuable lesson in the innocent acts of these two children – know what you want and don’t be apologetic about it.  While some would argue that the behavior of these two children represented greed, arrogance, or envy, I don’t believe that these girls harbored those feelings in their hearts at all.  Clearly, the girl that didn’t like the candy I had selected for her was simply asserting that what she received wasn’t going to work for her.  She wasn’t ungrateful about it, but she did assert her own truth in that moment.  The little one who wanted more was simply asking for more in the best way she could.  For all I know, they may have been allowed to only visit a few homes as I did notice her bucket was relatively empty when she visited.  Who was I to judge her intent especially one so innocent.

As I reflected later last evening and in writing this morning, I’m reminded that as adults, we often make the topic of ‘knowing what we want’ far more complicated than it needs to be.  This makes setting and pursuing objectives far more complex than is necessary.  There really is nothing wrong with having a clear picture in your mind on what you want and to be very direct with people.  How can you expect others to join you and follow your lead when your objective is opaque or too generalized to be of much use?  If your intentions are honorable and you don’t seek to harm in any way, then there should be nothing selfish or wrong about stating what you want and going for it.  Just like these two precious children, keeping it simple and direct is not only far more effective, it’s also more authentic.

Duane Grove is founder of Connect2Action and an aspiring quiet, reflective servant-leader.  Curious sage in perpetual development connecting us all on a journey of discovery of our highest purpose.  Follow Duane on Twitter @connect2action and connect with him on LinkedIn, Facebook, and Google+.  Learn more about Connect2Action by visiting www.connect2action.com.

You can follow his blogs at:  mindfulperspectives.blogspot.com and connect2action.blogspot.com

Leaders Don’t Have to be Competent

In my blog on 31 July titled Cultivating Mindful Leaders (http://bit.ly/Qtf2MQ), I addressed the importance the quality of mindfulness should be in how you select and develop strong leaders.  In this post, I’d like to consider the issue of competence with respect to leadership.  As I mentioned in my earlier article, organizations often select or promote people into positions of leadership based largely on their technical competence.  Most companies have not established alternative means of rewarding technical competence and therefore promote people as a means of recognizing their performance.  Leadership responsibilities usually come with promotion for which many are not well prepared.  Through successive reward cycles, a highly competent individual in their field of expertise can find themselves in a senior position but without the requisite relationship skills to lead a team.  Sound familiar?  I’ve seen this situation repeated time and time again not only in hi-tech companies, but others as well.

Within the executive ranks, the selection process often considers someone whose specific technical skills matter less.  You may have been puzzled when a senior executive from a completely different industry is selected over highly competent internal candidates; this happens on a frequent basis.  Certainly, the new executive isn’t expected to know the industry, customers, or company at a level and depth of knowledge where they would be considered ‘competent’ from a technical perspective.  However, where these individuals are often competent is leading people and it’s their skills, mindfulness, and ability to motivate others that is sought.  Mindful leaders are aware of both their strengths and weaknesses and are unafraid to rely on others where their own competence is lacking; they don’t have to be technically competent, just aware enough to know where to get assistance and who to rely on.  Great leaders can make the transition not only across organizations, but industries and roles as well. 

There are many options you can consider to break the cycle of rewarding technical competence with leadership positions; people can be recognized through other financial and non-financial means that don’t automatically require promotion.  Depending on your company, cash rewards, stock grants or options, or other forms of reward (such as company sponsored travel) can be considered.  Non-financial incentives can (and should) include public recognition celebrations, employee of the month awards, prizes, or products (such as a tablet or laptop).  You should consider seeking employee input into the types of recognition they believe strikes the right balance.  The key point is that superior technical competence should not be the sole or even primary reason for selecting someone for a leadership role unless you’re fully prepared to surround them with the tools and resources for them to grow into the expectations you have for your leaders.  As I highlighted in my earlier blog, thrusting someone into a leadership position when they’re not ready will almost guarantee they grow into mediocre or ineffective managers causing more harm than good in the future.

And when you find yourself in a situation where you have a highly competent individual from a technical perspective who is equally prepared to be a mindful leader, you have a potential rock star on your hands.  When you can combine those two qualities in a single package, magic can happen.  Leadership is a people intensive responsibility and people in those positions have the highest potential to impact entire organizations either for the positive or the negative.  Selecting and growing leaders requires the highest degree of care and deliberation and should never be a matter of checking a technically ‘competent’ box.

Duane Grove is founder of Connect2Action, a strategy execution specialist at the intersection of employee engagement and executive leadership, igniting innovation as a lever to accelerate your growth.  Follow Duane on Twitter @connect2action.

Cultivating Mindful Leaders

One topic I am passionate about is growing future leaders.  Having worked in large corporations over several decades, I have been repeatedly disappointed at how little attention is paid to selecting, nurturing, and building leaders.  The habits and behaviors, attitudes and philosophy new leaders establish when they experience their very first position as a supervisor or team lead usually cement in place the type of leader they will become.  Unfortunately, people are often selected for their technical competence with little thought given to their preparedness to lead.  Worse still is they are rarely given the time and attention, coaching and mentoring, critical to building the skills necessary to become truly great leaders.

Of all the qualities that seems to be lacking in leadership today, mindfulness is at the top of my list.  For me, the quality of mindfulness is the very foundation on which other skills should be built.  Mindfulness is like the still waters that run deep.  There is tremendous energy beneath the surface yet the mindful leader maintains a sense of calm around them.  The mindful leader brings strength and confidence without creating confusion and chaos.  Mindfulness is the by-product of awareness, and when people are aware (they are sensitive to) of who they truly are and what is going on around them, they make better decisions, treat others with greater respect, and take into account innumerable factors that others would easily miss or overlook.  Mindfulness requires an individual to be in touch with how their ego affects their actions and they take steps to avoid decisions where it's their ego that is leading instead of their true self.  Authenticity is another by-product of awareness.  They are consistently the same person regardless of situation and their words can be counted on to align with their actions.  Leaders mindful of who they are exercise greater respect for the views of others and aren't intimidated by alternative viewpoints.  They respect each person as a uniquely equipped individual with particular talents that when combined with others, can generate great results.  Mindful leaders are construction specialists.  They build other people and through building others, they help to create great organizations.

So why is it then that organizations choose to largely ignore newly-selected leaders?  Some continue to believe that leaders are born, not cultivated and they leave it up to chance that the new leader will pick it up as they grow.  Instead, what most of these people pick up are the bad habits and behaviors they see in others more senior then they.  Left to themselves, new leaders will surmise that the behaviors they see in those who have gone before and been "successful" must represent what it takes to be great.  Is it any wonder then that when those people achieve higher levels of leadership, they fail?  Remember that the consistently #1 reason why people leave a company is their manager, and those habits and behaviors were likely established when they were a new leader.  In my experience, mindful leaders are able to retain great talent because people know they are valued and treated fairly.  If you're trying to build a high performance organization then, you need to have a substantial supply of mindful leaders.  We are what we teach, and so if you want truly great leaders, you must start today to cultivate the values and behaviors you want in the future.

What happens all too often in most organizations is that new leaders are given few tools and support, and what they do receive is often focused on compliance and policy versus personal growth.  And even companies that may have initially supported their new leaders with personal development resources, quickly jettison them when financial difficulties arise.  A friend of mine who specializes in mindful coaching was recently notified by a very large, well-known IT company that his services would no longer be paid for by the company due to budget constraints.  So new leaders get help in ensuring HR compliant performance reviews are completed, company policies are understood and followed, and project performance metrics are collected and reported on time, but they are left on their own when it comes to developing personal awareness and development.  While it's not the company's sole responsibility to provide this support, it is the environment they create, the mentoring and coaching they provide, and the resources they make available that ultimately determine the success or failure of a leader, and by extension, the company itself.

I would encourage you therefore to build mindful leaders.  Make it a point to carefully select new leaders not based entirely on how competent they are, but also the qualities you observe in how they treat others, the degree of empathy they exhibit, how they support their colleagues, and look for the tell-tale signs of awareness.  From there, focus on building those attributes and deliberately surround the new leader with coaches and mentors that are themselves mindful.  For leaders already in place, consider doing a leadership reset in your organization to correct past errors when you may have promoted someone who really wasn't ready or lacked the qualities of mindfulness.  Finally, where it becomes necessary, replace leaders who aren't willing to focus on becoming more mindful.  You will be doing your organization, employees, and the individual a great favor in the long run.

Duane Grove is founder of Connect2Action, a strategy execution specialist at the intersection of employee engagement and executive leadership, igniting innovation as a lever to accelerate your growth.  Follow Duane on Twitter @connect2action.