Absurd – Our Unhealthy Attachment with Time

We are obsessed with time!  Just over the last two days, I was reminded how we often let time make decisions on our behalf.  It really seems that the frenzy of the season doesn’t matter.  People seem to be constantly in a hurry to get to wherever they are going as if every minute is a matter of life or death.  We are all familiar with the term “make every minute count” and it’s clear some people take that advice with intensity.

Just today for example, I was approaching a stoplight when someone came up quickly behind me in order to make it to the turning lane to my left just as the light turned red.  Suddenly, the person zipped in behind me following just off my rear bumper only to make a quick U-turn a block up the street to turn around, approach the light we just left, and make the turn they originally wanted.  Waiting the 3-4 minutes for another green light was just too much to ask for the driver.

Yesterday while shopping, I was selecting an item off the shelf and took a step back to review what I selected when someone hurriedly pushed up behind to proclaim rather gruffly “dude pay attention” before he pushed aside and up the aisle he went.  Both situations reminded me that these individuals simply couldn’t wait for even a few moments.  While I can’t be sure that either person had a real time crunch they were dealing with, I couldn’t help but reflect on how much stress these individuals must have been experiencing.

Time is an illusion.  Time is an artificial concept created to add structure to our existence.  While living without a clock would certainly introduce chaos in our modern lives, it reminds me that the ancients knew of no such constraint.  For example, while we know the Mayans had an obsession with time, their perspective was entirely different.  Modern time is viewed on a linear basis while the ancients saw time as a cycle.  Our linear perspective of time results in the kind of behavior that values time as a limited commodity that must be fiercely guarded sometimes regardless of how it may affect others.  This is how we get concepts like the “bucket list” and why we force ourselves into believing that our failure to “manage” time appropriately results in eternal bliss or damnation.

Time is the great stressor in our modern lives.  Think for a moment the words we use around the concept of time:

·       I ran out of time to finish the job.

·       Time just got away from me.

·       The time slipped right through my hands.

·       So much work to do and so little time.

·       I’m just killing time.

·       The time got away from me.

·       I’m passing the time by ….

·       Time is money.

·       His/her time was up.

·       Time flies.

·       I only have so much time to get it done.

·       ……. (and you can probably add to the list)

When it comes to matters of the spirit, every moment is timeless.  Eternity is presented to us in each breath we take.  It’s like staring at the small, almost invisible mustard seed and realizing within that tiny object is the potential for something much larger.  If you consider that many of the stars that light our night sky are entire universes, then perhaps what we believe about time may not be so obvious.  Living in the present is timeless.  This is probably why Jesus proclaimed we can experience heaven on earth – the kingdom is within us, accessible wherever and whenever we are, right NOW!

During this season when we so often get caught up rushing to and fro preparing for celebrations, remember to breathe and enjoy the eternal present moment.  Offer your awareness of the eternal that is available to all of us in each present moment as a gift to those around you, especially your loved ones.  Your total presence given selflessly is the greatest gift we can offer anyone.

Duane Grove is founder of Connect2Action and an aspiring quiet, reflective servant-leader.  Curious sage in perpetual development connecting us all on a journey of discovery of our highest purpose.  Follow Duane on Twitter @connect2action and connect with him on LinkedIn, Facebook, and Google+.  Learn more about Connect2Action by visiting www.connect2action.com.

You can follow his blogs at:  mindfulperspectives.blogspot.com and connect2action.blogspot.com

Pain – Learning’s Accelerator

Pain is one of those things most of us try to avoid because quite frankly, it’s painful.  But when we decide to trek away from pain, are we losing an opportunity?  You see pain is an ancient signal for learning.  Before the modern age, pain was the surest way to experience failure and learn from it.  While most of us no longer have to endure physical pain to learn life’s lessons, we view emotional pain with the same hesitation.

To understand this point, think back to your childhood.  Many of us learned the painful lesson not to touch a hot stove or some other harmful situation by personally experiencing it.  No matter how often our parents and others may have insisted we steer clear of the obstacle, our curiosity got the better of us and viola! a burned hand.  We learned in that immediate moment what words failed to convince us of.  We’re hard-wired to use pain for learning.  All animals are equipped this way.  Think about it. 

Pain in our lives is an accelerant to learning.  While we all profess to prefer learning from other people’s mistakes, it’s our own where we not only learn faster, but the lessons are burned (sometimes literally) into our minds.  Pain not only quickens the pace of learning, it has a tendency to stick much longer.  Every time we avoid pain then usually lengthens the time it takes to learn the valuable lessons embedded within.  The lessons we fail to learn end up circling back around on us in increasingly painful ways until we finally relent and journey through the process.  Pain is unavoidable – it’s part of the human condition.  The sooner we embrace the pain in our lives, the faster we’re able to move on.

The most profound lessons I’ve learned throughout my life have almost always come attached to pain.  Whether it’s something as simple as the proper way to swing an ax, or in ways I’ve handled important relationships or business dealings, the most life-enhancing events in my life started as seeds of pain before they blossomed into something beautiful.

Next time you find yourself staring into the face of pain look for the lessons to be learned.  Embrace pain as a companion knowing that what you are about to learn will serve to make you a better person.

Duane Grove is founder of Connect2Action and an aspiring quiet, reflective servant-leader.  Curious sage in perpetual development connecting us all on a journey of discovery of our highest purpose.  Follow Duane on Twitter @connect2action and connect with him on LinkedIn, Facebook, and Google+.  Learn more about Connect2Action by visiting www.connect2action.com.

You can follow his blogs at:  mindfulperspectives.blogspot.com and connect2action.blogspot.com

I Know What I Want!

I eagerly look forward to Halloween each year because inevitably some of the children in their costumes surprise me.  Last night was no exception and while I thoroughly enjoyed the energy and enthusiasm of the ‘trick-or-treat’ revelers, there were two little girls that just had me rolling in laughter.  They each in their own way signaled that they knew exactly what they wanted and in their uniquely innocent ways, reminded me that keeping things simple is sometimes the best path.

Both girls were probably not more than 4 years old and as cute as little ones can be especially at that age.  Both were somewhat shy in approaching our doorway and in a meek voice whispered their ‘trick-or-treat’ greeting.  This is where things got really funny.  The first girl watched me carefully place the candy in her bucket only to promptly pull it out proclaiming quite boldly and clearly that “I don’t like that kind” as she handed it back to me.  Trying to keep from bursting in laughter, I reached back into the bucket and pulled out something different asking her if that was better.  “Yes” she proclaimed, thanked me, and was on her way.  I just nearly split my gut laughing after she left and my wife who hadn’t witnessed this innocent act of assertion was soon laughing with me.

The second girl was even younger and being escorted by her older sister.  Like the first, she approached quietly and almost imperceptibly requested her treat.  After reaching into the bucket and placing a piece of candy in her bag, she looked up at me as if “only one piece” was insufficient and without a single word, reached her hand into the bucket, grabbed a few more pieces, thanked me, and turned.  Her sister all the while had this shocked look on her face insisting her younger sister return the extra candy.  I told her it was fine and they left.  Once again, I’m rolling on the stoop laughing uncontrollably.  Ah the innocence of children!

There was a valuable lesson in the innocent acts of these two children – know what you want and don’t be apologetic about it.  While some would argue that the behavior of these two children represented greed, arrogance, or envy, I don’t believe that these girls harbored those feelings in their hearts at all.  Clearly, the girl that didn’t like the candy I had selected for her was simply asserting that what she received wasn’t going to work for her.  She wasn’t ungrateful about it, but she did assert her own truth in that moment.  The little one who wanted more was simply asking for more in the best way she could.  For all I know, they may have been allowed to only visit a few homes as I did notice her bucket was relatively empty when she visited.  Who was I to judge her intent especially one so innocent.

As I reflected later last evening and in writing this morning, I’m reminded that as adults, we often make the topic of ‘knowing what we want’ far more complicated than it needs to be.  This makes setting and pursuing objectives far more complex than is necessary.  There really is nothing wrong with having a clear picture in your mind on what you want and to be very direct with people.  How can you expect others to join you and follow your lead when your objective is opaque or too generalized to be of much use?  If your intentions are honorable and you don’t seek to harm in any way, then there should be nothing selfish or wrong about stating what you want and going for it.  Just like these two precious children, keeping it simple and direct is not only far more effective, it’s also more authentic.

Duane Grove is founder of Connect2Action and an aspiring quiet, reflective servant-leader.  Curious sage in perpetual development connecting us all on a journey of discovery of our highest purpose.  Follow Duane on Twitter @connect2action and connect with him on LinkedIn, Facebook, and Google+.  Learn more about Connect2Action by visiting www.connect2action.com.

You can follow his blogs at:  mindfulperspectives.blogspot.com and connect2action.blogspot.com

Kisses on the Wind

The wind is an enigma – think about that for a moment. 

The wind has no start or end point.  It can appear ‘out of thin air’ and just as quickly be gone.  We can’t actually see the wind, yet we can easily observe its effects.  The wind can come forth as a fierce and destructive gale or just as easily arrive as a nearly imperceptible slight touch.  For these reasons, I find the wind to be a perfect focal point for meditation and reflection.  It is quite simply one of those things in life that can draw you into hours of amazement and wonder, suspending you from time and attachment.

The wind can be refreshing and relaxing in the midst of a hot summer day as it cools and rejuvenates.  It can be exhilarating and alive like a burst of cold air on a Fall day.  Then again, the wind can bite and sting like the swirling burst of energy on a snowy Winter day.  Have you ever pondered the wind?  Science can explain the mechanics of wind, measure its effects, characterize it, and even determine its speed and direction.  But even in doing so, a precise reading is only good for an instant because the wind is always changing.  The wind is freedom – you cannot capture it or hold it even when harnessing its energy, it’s simply just passing through.  Life is like that as well.  We are all just passing through like the wind.  Whatever captivity we may feel is of our own making – we can be as free as the wind if we choose to be.

It’s impossible to see the wind or to hold it in our hands.  We can only see the effects of the wind whether it’s in the rustling of leaves or clouds drifting by.  We know the wind is there based on its effect on other objects, but we don’t ever see the wind itself.  The wind is an energy that can have a major impact on our world just like the energy we experience in ourselves and others.  I’m sure you know of people whose energy is an obvious presence.  There are some who quite literally can suck the air out of room leaving others grasping for breath and suffocating.  Yet there are people whose presence literally light up those around them and lifts their own energy in such a positive way that everyone feels valued.  Being aware of the energy in your presence is a critical element of mindfulness.  It all starts with intention and a sincere desire to lift others rather than trample on them.  Being the “big personality” in the room drags others down when it’s ego that is driving.  When we choose instead to be authentic and genuine, it’s like stepping out into the vast openness of a majestic mountain inviting others to join you.

Reflecting on something as simple as the wind can be profound.  We exist in a world full of energy and forces that cannot be seen but that doesn’t mean they don’t exist or aren’t present in our lives.  And like the wind whose effects we can see without observing the force itself, our lives can positively impact the world around us in ways others welcome with joy.  Lifting others so they can gently soar on the energy of the wind and float gracefully through life is an obligation and a privilege.  However, when we let our egos get in the way, we can be like a hurricane or tornado leaving a path of destruction and suffering.  But when we live from our mindful, authentic self, we are capable of great benefit to others bringing forward an energy that others sense and can thrive in.  Sometimes, we leave a cool refreshing breeze on a hot day that lifts the spirit of another.  Then there are times we are called on to deliver a burst of cold air to awaken the soul challenging others to raise their awareness.  When we intend to bring forward peace and love, even a challenge can be accepted in the spirit it is delivered.

So next time you have a quiet moment outside, take the time to carefully be aware of the wind and in doing so, ask yourself what kind of affect are you having on others.  Think of the air you breathe and ask yourself if it’s so obvious that something you cannot see or hold can sustain your physical life, then it just may be equally true that the energy you bring forward is also present and experienced by others.

Duane Grove is founder of Connect2Action, a strategy execution specialist at the intersection of employee engagement and executive leadership, igniting innovation as a lever to accelerate your growth.  Follow Duane on Twitter @connect2action and connect with him on LinkedIn, Facebook, and Google+.  Learn more by visiting www.connect2action.com.

You can find Duane’s blogs at:

www.mindfulperspectives.blogspot.com

www.connect2action.blogspot.com

Not What but Who

Updated: 12/17/2012

As we continue on our life's journey to uncover our higher purpose and deeper meaning of our existence, we often confuse what we do with who we truly are.  Separating the two can be a deeply painful experience as it often forces us to question past decisions including in many cases our choice of profession.

A common theme lately in the coaching I’ve been doing has been dealing with the important difference between who you are versus what you do.  For those of us ‘Type-A’ personalities especially, we are often so driven by what we do that we come to confuse it with who we authentically are.  It’s an easy trap to fall into but one that creates a significant barrier to embracing and living our true purpose. 

Many of the folks I’ve worked with lately are struggling with this topic.  They are having great difficulty separating the two topics to the point where they believe that if they aren’t actively doing something that completely aligns with their authentic purpose, they'll be unable to find happiness and satisfaction.  While I’m a champion of finding alignment, the fact is that who we are is more a matter of how we show up to others than it is directly mapped to what we do especially from a career perspective.  Being authentic to our true self is a full-time deal that transcends not only our careers, but every engagement we have with others. 

Particularly in business, when we introduce ourselves it typically comes with some form of a title or function versus who we are.  While I’m the CEO of the company, who I am is more authentic to what people should experience when interacting with me.  Imagine if I introduced myself each time as the “quiet, reflective servant-leader” which at its root is who I am.  Most people would probably look at me puzzled by such a response followed almost immediately by “what does that mean?” as they are so accustomed to the more formalized introduction.  But what I want people to experience is someone who shows up as an intent listener seeking a way of serving them with a spirit of leadership. 

When my title as CEO (or call it whatever else you want) is what comes first, it’s my ego that is talking and not my authentic self.  It saddens me that this is not only the norm, but is the expectation.  Unfortunately it creates a context that delays if not prevents authentic dialog.  People view me from a perspective of position rather than a fellow human on a journey of discovery toward our higher purpose (also part of my life’s purpose).  When I dispense with the formalities and authentically approach someone with my purpose foremost on my mind and heart, there is almost immediate connection that enables deeper dialog, builds trust, and creates value not only for the other person, but myself as well.

What I advise people to do is to reflect on the values that define the heart of who they are.  Values are important indicators to what makes us tick inside and knowing those areas where you would never compromise tells us much about who we are.  Breaking through the habit of representing ourselves based on ‘what’ we do isn’t easy but it’s so worth the effort.  While the words I use to describe my life’s purpose may be refined and evolve over time, there are some principles that represent the unique qualities of my human existence.  That is who I am and it is my obligation to do everything I can to ensure that people experience me in that way. 

What are the values that define you?  What principles would you stand firm for regardless of the situation?  What do you want to leave behind?  Find your authentic center and stand in it for there you will find yourself.

Duane Grove is founder of Connect2Action, a strategy execution specialist at the intersection of employee engagement and executive leadership, igniting innovation as a lever to accelerate your growth.  Follow Duane on Twitter @connect2action and connect with him on LinkedIn, Facebook, and Google+.  Learn more by visiting www.connect2action.com.

You can find Duane’s blogs at:

www.mindfulperspectives.blogspot.com

www.connect2action.blogspot.com

The Human Connection – More Precious than Gold

For those of you who regularly read my blog, you’ll have noticed the tree theme lately in my reflections.  This is another piece inspired by the Fall colors and the beauty we are treated to each year.

Here in Colorado, we get an explosion of gold as the leaves turn.  Our trees have been nothing short of spectacular this year.  As I sat quietly soaking in the warm afternoon sun filtering through the bright leaves, it brought me to a point of tremendous revelation.  In this world of ours, we are too often absorbed in chasing gold rewards for our efforts.  But just like the beautiful display of leaves on this tree, the money we work so hard to earn provides only a temporary moment of joy.  Those gifts of gold will soon fall from their branches, dry, and transform into refuse.  So too is the money we pursue in our lives.  We marvel at the gold before us only to have it drift away on the winds before our very eyes.

The people in our lives however are not fleeting like Fall leaves or financial rewards.  The one thing that holds its brilliance and value are the people that I’ve been privileged to share my journey with.  Relationships have eternal value and bring a depth of joy and peace that nothing in our physical world could ever come close to.  They nourish our spirits in incomprehensible ways while offering us the opportunity to return the favor.  Many have said that money is the root of evil, yet it is more accurately stated that the “love” of money is the root of evil.  To try and hold onto money hording it with greed is as futile as standing under this tree doing everything possible to keep the gold from fading and the leaves from falling.  In the end, people matter and everything else is just temporary.

Some people are like evergreens standing steadfast regardless of the change in seasons.  They are often those closest to us or that inspire us the most and are there for us when we need them.  Others are like the beautiful trees that flower and leaf in the spring, offer shade through the summer then fade into our memories with a last explosion of color.  I’ve had the privilege of having my life touched by many people who came into my life, shared just a part of the journey, then left me with wonderful memories upon their departure having added to the palette of my life.

At the end of the day, remember that the connections we have with people whether they are close or just fleeting are the most precious gifts we have.  They can bring color and joy to our lives like nothing else can.  So as the leaves of Fall offer up their last few days of beauty, perhaps you may be inspired to think about those people that have graced your life with such joy.

Duane Grove is founder of Connect2Action, a strategy execution specialist at the intersection of employee engagement and executive leadership, igniting innovation as a lever to accelerate your growth.  Follow Duane on Twitter @connect2action and connect with him on LinkedIn, Facebook, and Google+.

Living Life as a Channel

Weeks ago I posted a blog entitled “I Am My Own” (http://bit.ly/OEI0W2) in which I reflected upon the realization that I am fundamentally unique in the connections I open myself to and less so because of what I know.  I began to realize as reflected in that piece that what I think is really “my own” is not and instead I am simply a means through which energy and wisdom has the opportunity to flow.  This thought has stayed with me and in my meditation today, the image of a channel became vividly present.  But it wasn’t a channel in a modern sense like a TV channel or social media channel.  Instead, the channel that I experienced is an ancient one created by the flow of water that over time can create a great canyon.

Water is similar to energy and wisdom and relies upon a willing channel through which to journey.  Wisdom exists in infinite quantities and has been available from the beginning of our universe as people have drawn from it and added back into it.  Some things quite simply haven’t found an open and available channel to flow through and are just waiting for that willing individual to connect through.  I began to realize that the momentary ‘flashes of brilliance’ that have come to me occasionally including this very reflection, were not at all the product of some great thinking on my part and I now “own”.  Instead they come to me at points when I’ve been an open receptacle, willing to let energy move through me. 

For example, I thought more deeply about why people hire me in my consulting business.  Is it because of my intelligence and experience?  I don’t think so as there are many people with equal or greater quantities of both.  Instead, my most successful experiences have been when I’ve been a catalyst to release energy and thought and helped removing obstacles enabling frictionless connections.  In those instances, I offered an open channel and from there invited others to add their own flow of energy to create an even greater and more powerful current capable of carving an even deeper channel.  Clients have told me that I brought a tangible energy into the space and I left them with even more.  What a confirmation of the importance of connection and being an unrestricted conduit for energy, wisdom, creativity, and knowledge to flow through.  There are far too many instances for me to recall when the words I shared with others came from a source I cannot identify and did not exist in any prepared remarks or material I had developed.  I am both humbled and astonished when this happens and more than anything else grateful for the privilege of having been the simple outlet.

Some people open themselves and become like a super-highway of energy and wisdom leaving behind a beautiful legacy much like the Colorado River has done through the Grand Canyon.  These people lived their lives realizing that the flow of energy through them to humanity was what their life was all about and at their passing, they left behind such beauty that others marvel at it for eternity.  But like the Grand Canyon, they didn’t live their lives with the self-serving intent to become a grand edifice for others to honor.  Instead, they took the selfless path and allowed themselves to be methodically carved by the eternal wisdom shared through them.

Others live like a quiet stream meandering through a meadow.  While the waters gently bubbling and drifting along may not carve great canyons, the effects of water’s movement are evident nonetheless.  For people like this, the flow through their lives brings great peace and serenity to those willing to sit quietly for a few moments.  We know when we’re with people whose lives are a gentle channel as they bring such a presence of peace to an often-hectic world. 

Still others hoard and protect what they know as if it’s theirs.  They erect large dams in their lives holding back the vast energy behind a wall of concrete and steel never realizing perhaps until too late, that it was in sharing and connection that authentic value is experienced.  Energy has no value without a channel and a willingness to allow it to flow.  People that protect what they know as if it belongs to them are perceived as self-serving and the results are equally self-destructive.  Social media expert Kim Garst frequently Tweets about the importance of being an open channel and sharing; she knows that wisdom is expanded when selflessly shared and opportunity is lost when it is not.  Of what value are you to others if you accumulate a Hoover’s Dam worth of knowledge and never release its energy to the universe?

I’ve talked with people who share instances where a new invention or idea surfaces and they proclaim with both surprise and disappointment that they had that very same idea years ago, but failed at the time to act on it.  A connection had been made, the insight delivered, but the switch was never turned on.  A friend of mine holds the conviction that a cure for most cancers already exists in the repositories of great minds and intellectual property of companies.  However, those people and organizations are reluctant to share what they know in connection with others holding the false belief (in my opinion) that they will be the ones to ultimately capitalize on the solution.  They believe sharing what they know will somehow diminish their claim to financial and heroic glory.

It is a humbling experience to realize that our lives are meant to be channels through which others can be enriched.  When you think of what you know in this context, how could you ever believe that you are somehow better or more gifted than someone else.  The key to “success” then is in how open and available you are to the flow of wisdom and energy available to everyone and then most importantly, how willing you are to reflect it back, share it, and build upon it.  There is no room for arrogance or self-serving pride when you offer yourself as a humble channel.  So, to use a modern term, tune in and once you have, be selfless and allow what flows through you to carve itself into an incredible gift that is as timeless and magnificent as the great canyons on our planet.

Duane Grove is founder of Connect2Action, a strategy execution specialist at the intersection of employee engagement and executive leadership, igniting innovation as a lever to accelerate your growth.  Follow Duane on Twitter @connect2action and connect with him on LinkedIn, Facebook, and Google+.  Learn more by visiting www.connect2action.com.

One Leaf at a Time

Sitting quietly this early morning outside under the Fall trees, it occurred to me just how incredibly beautiful life truly is.  With hardly a breeze in the air, I marveled, as a single leaf would slowly drift from its branch, giving up its final show in selfless love before gently touching the ground.  An occasional light wind would prompt several leaves to make the journey from their perch above to join the growing pile on the ground around me.  Holding a single leaf in my hand, I wondered and meditated on the life this single leaf had lived before giving itself up to the inevitable rhythm of the seasons.  Oh how our lives are like this!

I wonder at the end of my own journey will I be ready to gracefully fall from the tree of life and offer myself to those that follow as my own leaf falls to the ground to rot and my body becomes nourishment for others.  Will I have joyfully stretched my face to the sun and soaked up its warmth reflecting it back to others?  Will my life had absorbed the rains and served to deliver refreshment to the tree of humanity as selflessly as this leaf had for its parent?  How would I have endured the summer gales – would I have been strong enough to hold fast and steady or did I snap loose only to die too soon?  And at the end of my life, will I deliver such a spectacular show of color allowing others to reflect on the fruits of my life with great thanks and joy like the joy I have for this single leaf now in my hand?

Duane Grove is founder of Connect2Action, a strategy execution specialist at the intersection of employee engagement and executive leadership, igniting innovation as a lever to accelerate your growth.  Follow Duane on Twitter @connect2action and connect with him on LinkedIn, Facebook, and Google+.  Learn more by visiting www.connect2action.com.

Trees in the Mirror

Brisk mornings, the sun sleeping in longer each day, the leaves turning.  This is the time of year that some look upon with a sense of sadness as Summer fades and the sentinels of Winter return.  Yet for me, Fall is a magical time that reminds me of the cycle of life itself.  Have you ever reflected deeply upon the messages that trees have to offer about our own existence, our universe, and the value of life?  Trees are in fact a unique mirror reflecting back to us important lessons if we take the time to stare into them.  Trees speak to me, and I to them.

The roots of great trees are no different than those that anchor us.  Great trees have roots that run deep and wide.  Like the values in our lives that hold us in place, roots establish our place in the world.  The trunk holds within it the very nature of who the tree is and like character, it defines our identity, visible to anyone.  Every tree is unique and no two trees are exactly the same just like no two humans are the same.  Trees are willing to spread their seeds to the wind without the assurance they will take root and grow.  Are we selective in where we allow the seeds of our own efforts and life to take root or are we willing like the trees to share our fruits with any and all trusting the spirit of the universe to select the right soil and location?

As the leaves begin to turn and fall, it reminds me of the cycle of new birth, life, and death of the cells in our own bodies.  What takes an entire year for a tree, happens continuously within us.  We may lament the passing of Summer, but the 365 days of our world pass in an instant within us.  Trees know no time, only the natural process that is a part of their being.  Without this cycle, our own bodies would die instantly just as trees rely on the seasons to fuel their own growth.  Trees sing forth with a great array of color before they enter a period of internal growth, consuming the energy gained throughout the Summer.  The explosion of color we marvel at in Fall, is a reflection of the energy that drives our own personal growth.  And as Fall gives way to Winter, the trees stand naked against the cold winds and snow, with feet planted firmly in the ground, withstanding the assault with their eyes and arms toward the heavens knowing the warmth of Spring will in fact return and new growth will burst forth.

Trees with shallow roots can fall victim to fierce winds, just like those without strong values can falter and break.  Storms can shake the leaves from branches or even break them.  For me, this is like the trials we all face in life, pruning away the weak areas making room for new growth or in some cases re-shaping us to grow in a different direction.  As snow inevitably comes to blanket the ground and branches, the bark acts as an insulator protecting the essence of life within.  The bark in our own lives is an extension of the roots and trunk, allowing us to be touched by the cold yet not defeated.

Trees can teach us about how we should live.  The shade from a great tree, the shelter of its branches, and the nourishment it offers other creatures knows no prejudice.  A tree does not discriminate against those that can find protection, solace, and enjoyment under its loving care.  It stands tall and confident welcoming any and all that pass its way.  Do we live our own lives the same way?  Do those that pass our way find cool refreshment in our shade or do we push them away back out into the hot sun?  Will people that land on our branches find a perch to rest before continuing their journey, or do we shake them off?  A tree knows no such behavior.

Trees speak to me, and I to them.  Next time you see a tree, let its message of strength, hope, and faith speak to you.  Stand in a forest and reflect upon how each tree is unique yet finds itself in great company with others, not feeling jealous or envious of those around it.  Let the trees speak to you, and if you quiet yourself long enough, perhaps you too can speak back with thanks and gratitude.

Duane Grove is founder of Connect2Action, a strategy execution specialist at the intersection of employee engagement and executive leadership, igniting innovation as a lever to accelerate your growth.  Follow Duane on Twitter @connect2action and connect with him on LinkedIn, Facebook, and Google+.  Learn more by visiting www.connect2action.com.

When is Change Really Change?

Fall is upon us and with it comes the change in weather, the leaves turning and falling away, and the gradual decline in temperatures.  Fall is a period of transition and while some are eager for the change (Fall happens to be my favorite season), others dread its signal that Winter will soon be upon us.  Change is an inevitable fact of life.

Just over the last week, I have experienced an extraordinary amount of “change” in my personal and professional life.  With this convergence of some very significant situations that will affect my family and myself immediately and over the rest of our lives, I began to reflect upon when that “change” actually occurred.  It turns out, that several of the situations now present to me have in fact been in motion for months and in one case, for years.  It was only just within the last week that awareness of the realities of these events became known and recognized.  So when does change actually become change?  In other words, were these in fact changes when they first occurred without my awareness of them, or did they become change at the point that I recognized their reality?  Even more importantly, at what point did it really matter?  An even deeper question I’ve pondered is whether or not their reality is fact, perception, or some combination.  It’s like that age-old question:  if a tree falls in the forest and nobody is around, does it make a sound?

Change is fundamentally an experience, not an event.  Because change is a constant in every aspect of our universe, it is the experience of that change filtered through our perceptions and attitudes that determines its nature, not the change itself.  Here is a basic fact: different people can reach very different conclusions yet experience the same event.  A situation for one person may not even rise to their awareness while another may view it as catastrophic.  I often use this simple example.  Most of us have witnessed an auto accident or perhaps had the unfortunate experience of being in one.  The attending officer must gather statements from as many people as possible in order to piece together a conclusion on what happened.  Keep in mind that each witness or victim observed the same event, yet the conclusions could be as unique and different as each and every individual present.  How can so many people have witnessed the same thing yet come to a very different set of observables and had a different experience?  It’s all in perception; perception shaped by attitudes, experiences, emotional state, and a myriad of many other factors.  So how does all this relate to change?

Change doesn’t happen to us, it’s in how we choose to perceive, interpret, and respond, that determines if an event becomes a moment of change in our lives or is simply another event.  When you come to understand that the reality of change is a decision that you control, it can create a much broader range of possibilities; you suddenly have options!  I’ve often marveled at people who are seemingly standing in the center of a cyclone yet seem unmoved and calm as if the sky is blue, birds are singing, and the sun is warming their skin.  You wonder how in the world such peace and calm can be found in the midst of so much turmoil.  But what may seem as chaos and gloom to one person is relatively harmless to another. 

Can change then be judged by some measure of magnitude?  Here again, the event is in the eyes of the beholder.  While a majority of people might conclude that a significant change has happened, it doesn’t mean consensus; there might still be others that look upon the event and yawn.  So magnitude is also a relative measure and not a reliable indicator of the significance of an event.

A great reflection to use when you’re facing into a moment of change then is to shift your perspective.  Look at others who may be directly involved and those that are on the periphery.  How are they interpreting the experience and what reaction(s) are they having?  Assume for the moment that their perspective is correct and yours is misguided.  Allow yourself to experience the event as if you were literally in their shoes.  Take the role of the traffic officer collecting witness statements, and then with that additional information, draw your own conclusion.  Taking the time to reflect before acting may just save you time and frustration while allowing you to be more circumspect in judging the situation.

Duane Grove is founder of Connect2Action, a strategy execution specialist at the intersection of employee engagement and executive leadership, igniting innovation as a lever to accelerate your growth.  Follow Duane on Twitter @connect2action and connect with him on LinkedIn, Facebook, and Google+.  Learn more by visiting www.connect2action.com.

Embrace the Profound

As the weather cools, I’m reminded of the warmth that a blanket offers and a loving embrace brings.  As humans, we often embrace one another as a sign of love and affection, but how often we take such a gesture for granted.  Whether it’s a spouse, child, parent, or a friend, the human embrace is a deeply profound act. 

In meditation, it’s often typical to experience the loving embrace of the spiritual leaders who have gone before us as well as those we are privileged to know.  The embrace is a way to touch others physically and spiritually.  The warmth and comfort that comes fills us completely when we allow it to.  For me, it’s like that warm cup of tea that emanates from within and spreads throughout my soul.  While other creatures may embrace to signal safety and affection, humans have the unique opportunity to be more fully aware of the significance of the gesture.

One of the most profound opportunities we have is when we realize that the universe is continually embracing us with its love and wisdom.  In that moment of solitude, we have access to energy that transcends our human existence and can transport us into the spiritual.  The human skin is a living organism that not only protects us but also allows us to communicate.  Touch is a powerful force that can be used for good and evil.  It allows us to speak without words and brings connection in ways that no other means of communication offers.  A loving and heartfelt embrace can be like the kiss of the warm sun on our skin that penetrates deep into our souls.

How often we embrace another out of habit, a feeling of obligation, or convention.  When we do so without bringing awareness to the act, we miss out on an opportunity to experience the embrace of the spirit itself.  So next time you have the opportunity to share an embrace, bring your awareness to the fore and realize you are sharing and receiving a profound embrace of the spirit of life itself.  Embrace someone today and with that act of love, let the energy of that experience fill you up.

Duane Grove is founder of Connect2Action, a strategy execution specialist at the intersection of employee engagement and executive leadership, igniting innovation as a lever to accelerate your growth.  Follow Duane on Twitter @connect2action and connect with him on LinkedIn, Facebook, and Google+.  Learn more by visiting www.connect2action.com.