Our lives are connected in a deep and profound way to the
rhythm of the universe. Its energy
breathes life into each new day.
Contemplating its source has always been a catalyst of curiosity and challenge
for me. From whence does this energy
come? How are we connected to all that
is around us? And probably most
significant, what do those connections tell us about our place in the
universe? The sunrise often draws me
back to these fundamental questions; questions about the meaning of life and
our individual purposes here on this planet.
Each delicate ray of sunshine is like a loving kiss in the morning
awakening me
I try to wake before the sun greets the day. For me, the rising sun is a magical event
that I never tire of. At the very moment
energy from the glowing orb begins to touch everything, my mind and heart are
drawn to an overwhelming sense of contentment and contemplation. First a light glow and then a glorious
explosion of light, the arrival of the sun signals hope. Each drop of the sun’s rays gently touches everything
in its path. Like the human kiss offered
in love connecting two people together in a deep exchange of energy, the sun
offers its touch of love to the entire planet without prejudice or
preconditions.
Compare for a moment the life-giving energy of the sun to
the human heart. When people connect
deeply at the heart level, it generates a burst of energy that feeds the soul
in the same way the sun’s rise each day prompts an explosion of warmth and growth. People deeply connected to each other are
nourished in the same way as the sun’s rays serve the planet. That’s
why two people in love feel ‘connected’ in their hearts; there is real energy in the connection and just because it cannot be seen
doesn’t mean it isn’t real. For instance, we don’t see
electricity flowing through the outlet yet don’t doubt its existence. Why then conclude that love’s connective energy
is nothing more than a ‘feeling’?
The sun is a reliable source without bias. It shines on all in equal measure. The sun doesn’t decide that some creatures
and living beings are given more than others.
The sun’s energy is freely offered and life draws precisely what it
needs from it. Unlike other things in
nature, humans have the ability to choose how the energy of love and connection
are used. As humans, the energy of love
and the power to 'control' it can be as easily used to destroy another as it can to
uplift them. Humans have inflicted great
pain upon others in the name of love.
What makes human connection unique is the power of intention and heart.
The act of “loving” another is to risk exposing one’s self. In vulnerability, we learn to trust and it is
trust that is the carrier of love from one to another. Where trust is absent, love has no means of
transport – it is stuck in place. Think
about that for a moment. In your own
experience, have you ever had a deep connection with someone where there was no
trust? It matters not if a relationship
is romantic or simply a deep friendship, trust is a key nutrient for connection. The easiest way for one human to inflict pain
on another is to cause destruction of trust in a relationship. Whether intentional or not, when trust goes,
so does the connection.
Another element is exposure.
When we open ourselves to another, the light illuminates what may have
been hidden. Like much of life itself,
love cannot grow in the dark. As the
Bible states ‘don’t hide your light under a basket’. Trust and exposure go hand-in-hand and you
can’t have one without the other. In
exposing oneself to another, you are willing to be vulnerable; you trust the
other with your weakness. Remember the
game of trust where one person stands with their back to another and is asked
to close their eyes and “trust” their partner to catch them as they fall
backward? This is what it’s like to
expose yourself in a way that places your wellbeing into the hands of another.
Connection and love must first start though within and this
is often the most difficult and painful realization. As humans, we cannot give what we don’t
possess. If you fail to respect and love
yourself, any expression of love you offer another lacks sincerity. It’s only when we have grounded ourselves in
a conviction that we each are unique and special, that we then have something
of substance to offer another. To ‘love
your neighbor as yourself’ is a deeply profound truth often dismissed as
cliché. Yet this is precisely the path
we each must follow. To love oneself
require us to know oneself. And living
out our journey in denial of our true self brings sorrow and pain. How often have we made choices based on what
we thought others would want? And the
longer we remain stuck in those patterns, the more difficult it becomes for
everyone involved.
What can make this inward journey painful is that it can be
interpreted as a very selfish act. Our
society and norms tell us that being “self-centered” is really bad and when we
‘think only of ourself’ that we are less loving, less compassionate, less
human. So we succumb to the pressure and
stay the course only to be reminded on a frequent basis we are living a lie or
at a minimum, denying our higher potential.
I know how much I’ve struggled with this element of the human
journey. The paradox that is often so
hard to embrace is that if you don’t love yourself, everything else is
fake. Especially in Western culture,
love is viewed as external – it is what we give to another. Yet love is a flame kept burning from the
inside, not something that comes to us.
Yes, when someone expresses love toward us, it can further increase its
energy, but how many times has someone tried to express love to you and you
rejected it? Whether you felt unworthy
or distracted, love’s energy directed toward us must have a willing receptacle.
I live in the deep belief of the power of human
connection. But in order for that credo
to be real in my own life, I must first come to love myself. The more I come to love myself – to be
comfortable in my own skin – the greater the source of energy I can extend in
connection with others. Accept
that you are special, unique, and here for a purpose. Love what’s inside first. If you want to give much, make sure you have
filled your bank. When Jesus spoke to
the Samaritan woman about a wellspring forever flowing with water, he was
speaking to the potential she possessed within herself. Tap into that source and allow the power of
human connection to transform your life. And next time when the sun's beams offer gentle kisses perhaps it will remind you to first let its energy penetrate within, warm your heart, then burst forth in radiant connection with others.
Duane Grove is founder of Connect2Action and an aspiring
quiet, reflective servant-leader.
Curious sage in perpetual development connecting us all on a journey of
discovery of our highest purpose. Follow
Duane on Twitter @connect2action and connect with him on LinkedIn, Facebook,
and Google+. Learn more about
Connect2Action by visiting www.connect2action.com.
You can follow his blogs at: mindfulperspectives.blogspot.com and
connect2action.blogspot.com
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